Dealing with the Post-Holiday Blues
The holidays just weren’t what you expected this year. Time with family was disappointing or just didn’t happen, and now it’s time to get back into the daily routine.
After the holidays, many people experience the post holiday blues, said Esther VanDyne, a psychologist at Applied Psychological Services in Northern Ohio. The holidays were a letdown and the future looks bleak, leaving many people to deal with depression once the presents are unwrapped and dropping needles.
“After the build-up for the holidays is the natural letdown,” VanDyne said. “And with the New Year people make New Year’s resolutions. And those are often difficult to keep, causing guilt and a sense of failure.”
The reasons people get depressed after the holidays can range from not getting the gifts they wanted to having high expectations that weren’t met, VanDyne said. Financial problems also begin to set in once the Christmas bills start rolling in, especially for those who spent more on gifts than they could afford.
The extra stress and fatigue that comes with the holiday season can also lead to the after holiday blues, according to the National Mental Health Association Web site. People are constantly on the go during the holiday season, and once the guests are gone and life gets back to normal, people often feel burned out. Emotional disappointments that came during the holiday season also can lead to depression.
After the hustle and bustle the holidays bring, there isn’t always much to look forward to in the months ahead, VanDyne said.
And New Year’s Eve doesn’t seem all that fabulous for those who don’t have big party plans for New Year’s Eve and who don’t like what they see when they look back over the year. Lima (Ohio) Memorial Health System Director of Pastoral Care and Social Services Dottie Kaiser said the thought of being alone on New Year’s Eve mixed with thoughts of the future can cause anxiety and depression at a time when everybody is supposed to be celebrating.
“‘What are you doing on New Year’s Eve?’ That’s the question. You feel like you can’t say, ‘I’m going to stay home and put my jammies on,’” Kaiser said. “Our society has put huge expectations on New Year’s Eve, that that’s the night to party. In reality, it’s just another day of the year.”
Expectations for a great night leave people feeling depressed if they don’t have plans and let down if they do have plans and expectations aren’t met, Kaiser said. The pressure is there, with hotel packages and events advertised all over to make your night one to remember. New Year’s Eve can be especially difficult for singles who don’t have a significant other to spend the last night of the year with, whether it’s at a rockin’ party or snuggled up for a romantic night at home.
Thoughts of New Year’s Eves past can also bring people down on Dec. 31, said VanDyne. People tend to focus on how things used to be and become depressed when they realize that this New Year’s Eve will be different. Mixing those sad feelings with alcohol doesn’t help the bad mood and can lead to an even deeper depression before the night is over.
While single people can have a tough time on New Year’s Eve, couples struggle, too, VanDyne said. Often, couples who are headed for divorce attempt to hold it together through the holidays. Dec. 31 and Jan. 1 mark the end of the holiday season. With only the cold months ahead to look forward to, that new beginning for the year ahead can look pretty bleak.
For the people who end up spending New Year’s Eve alone for whatever reason, Kaiser suggests enjoying the time by yourself. Don’t accept a date with someone you don’t like just to avoid being by yourself.
“Re-evaluate what your choices are and what you really want. Do you need to impress somebody else?,” Kaiser said. “You need to really stop and think, ‘what do I enjoy doing?’ ’’
After Jan. 1, the cold and bleak winter months are officially here and will be until the end of March or early April. The lack of sunlight means that Seasonal Affective Disorder sets in for many people, prolonging and adding to the holiday blues that set after the New Year is rang in. Making unrealistic resolutions can also lead to post holiday depression, VanDyne said. Making unreachable goals only sets you up for failure. Start small and make resolutions you know you can keep.
“It’s important to be realistic about change, especially when it comes to New Year’s resolutions,” VanDyne said. “Let’s be realistic instead of saying I’m going to lose 25 pounds, how about I’m going to use sweetener in my coffee rather than sugar.”
There are other ways to beat post holiday depression, Van-Dyne said, including exercising and soaking up as much sun and light that you can. The dreary winter days lead to depression, but adding extra light to the home or office can help brighten your mood. Get outside whenever you can — don’t hibernate all winter. Go out with friends and socialize when you can. And when it comes to resolutions, find a friend with similar goals and start a support system. Make diet changes with a friend or find a workout body to help keep motivated.
If finances are the source of your blues, get some help, Van-Dyne said. Get financial advice and don’t let yourself get any deeper into money problems. If overeating during the holiday season is what plagues you, start moving. Exercising will help shed those extra pounds and just help you to feel better.
Post holiday depression can last a week or two or even until the end of the winter months, VanDyne said. If depression doesn’t go away in a few weeks, VanDyne recommends seeing your family doctor or finding a counselor. Depression is treatable, no matter what the cause.
“It’s not something you want to linger. I love telling people ‘you don’t have to feel this bad,’ ” VanDyne said.
Tips for New Year’s Resolutions
• Make realistic New Year’s resolutions. Make small goals rather than big, unachievable goals.
• Exercise to help shed extra holiday weight and to feel more energized.
• Plan ahead. If you don’t want to be alone, make plans that you know you’ll enjoy.
• Do something to change your mood. Have a list of things that cheer you up.
• Don’t make your expectations too high. You’re just setting yourself up to be disappointed.
• If depression lasts for more than a few weeks, seek professional help.
• Turn on extra lights at the office and at home to add brightness to the dark, cold days.
• Take advantage of sunny days. Get outside when you can during the winter months.